- We will be watching your career with great interest. ;-) Atarumaster88 (Talk page) 16:57, 2 January 2009 (UTC)
Review from the desk of Atarumaster88
A year after I made my comment above, I've finally finished reading Golden Age of the Republic: Hidden Truths. The final verdict is, it's a good, solid read, but I didn't know that it would be until the second segment. Truth be told, the novel starts kinda slow, and one minor quibble is the use of ambient lighting in space. Niggling grammar errors, specifically related to missing words and tense, pop up at about 10 per segment, and there are some Warsian expressions that could be substituted—e.g. "holoprojector" for "hologram machine." The plot quickly picks up, though, engrossing the reader in a fast-paced planet-hopping chase as Evening Delwynn follows a trail of bodies to track down a mysterious criminal. The characters are well-written and interesting, and the dialogue seems natural, though a bit snappy at times. The author skips over most of the supporting characters' backstories except for brief tidbits—everyone's except Delwynn's, that is, in favor of moving the mystery along. A shame that more of them aren't allowed to interact with people other than Delwynn for prolonged periods of time—the Asara and Dastari interplay has a lot of potential, for one.
Basically, I liked the story. Had a nice plot, characters were solid, and the suspense was definitely there—pacing was spot on. At one point, I was suspecting one of the team members of being in on the conspiracy. It needs some polishing, though, and for the next installment in the work, it'd be interesting to see some of the other characters get a bit more development, although the focus on Delwynn certainly works well for the first installment. Also, since there's not a full BTS for this work, it's hard to tell, but I'm pretty sure I picked up some serious influences from a certain television show. It's not just one character—it's multiple. Dastari, the Medical Examiner, Shalli, Asana, even Delwynn have parallel characters with many of the same attributes. . . this could just be wild speculation, but it seems a bit more than coincidental. Anyway, once again, good read, Fiolli, though I would recommend you do a thorough proofreading before submitting it for FW. After that, I'd be happy to look it over and support. Atarumaster88 (Talk page) 05:09, January 18, 2010 (UTC)
Having read about 90% of this thing, I can honestly say this is a very good read. The characters remain true to themselves, the drama is dramatc (), the prose is plentiful, and the story is solid. I see no reason why this novel could not easily become a Featured Work. Good job, two thumbs up. I look forward to finishing my read and moving on to the next installments in the series. --D.W. (talk) 00:12, June 3, 2011 (UTC)