Thread:MPK/@comment-31421-20200202201639

I finally finished this and have some comments. First, let me stress as emphatically as I can that I am not your target audience for this work. I haven't touched KotOR II in over five years, much less remember the intricacies of the storyline. As a companion work to KotOR II from someone who played through the game, I think it's an interesting psychological exploration of a DS Female Exile. Reading it as a standalone work from someone who played through the game once years ago, it took me re-reading most of it to follow the storyline. So, I will give you my thoughts as someone not really qualified to judge it as a companion work. You can decide whether or not those lack of qualifications invalidates my rational.

For example, the prologue. It's an interesting hook, but not having the scene where she confronts the Council or any scene shortly there after is in a way diminishing. There are many momentous events that happen to the character offscreen as it were--mostly within the game--that don't need to be explicitly written--but I wonder if that is one jump too many to go straight from pre-KotOR II to Telos. Even more inline references to all of the events that transpired would help smooth over the transition. For someone intimately familiar with the game, it's redundant. You already know how the Exile got to Peragus.

I also think you set up an interesting dynamic where Meetra pulls in the personal loyalty of those in her circle (especially Atton). In that sense, if the scenes on Dantooine are supposed to be the emotional fulcrum, I found it a little lacking. She believes and comes to the realization that the Jedi are misusing her and there will at best be an alliance of convenience. What throws me off is that she found these people thinking she needed them to fight the Sith. Sure, in Home she decides that she won't serve them or even help them and she's going to treat them as enemies. However, the reader never sees her rationale for why she doesn't need them, whether it's because she's strong enough to face the Sith on her own, doesn't care, etc. Any of those responses, irrational though some might be, makes sense. What is harder is when no reason is given.

A few chapter-by-chapter comments:

Quickening - it is interesting to me that 1) Meetra did not know why red blades were disfavored and 2) that she chose to do it out of sheer defiance. She didn't strike me as being contrary for the sake of being contrary, except possibly to Kreia. Similar with hating kinrath. It seems irrational for a Jedi to hate a simple nonsentient being driven purely by instinct.

Condemned - Meetra goes from being too caring on Nar Shaddaa to being so callous on Dxun that she doesn't care about one Mandalorian. Of course, the difference could be that the Mandalorian is a (weak) threat whereas Lootra was helpless. Her being caring on Nar Shaddaa is the outlier. I could understand her being too caring and attached to those in her circle and distant to those without. Of course, by the end of the work, I wonder how that Meetra would react to Lootra. It would be interesting for her to reflect back on that incident after the fact and remark with a changed perspective. Home - Her relationship with Atton is so see-sawing, but I also think it works. She is disinterested in him, then reluctantly agrees to train him, then distances herself from him on Dantooine only to fall for him sort of? A lot of it is handled offscreen, perhaps too much, for my taste. I also understand your reluctance to write My KotOR II Playthrough, the Novel. Spirits - Who is the little light that Kreia senses?Hopefully these semi-coherent thoughts have some capability to spark thought, though I am doubtful. I must again stress my inadequacy in reviewing something so heavily dependent on a game that is a distant memory, but maybe there's something here. I look forward to reading the ''Torchbearer. '' 