The Fanon Menace/Season 1/Episode 17 script

Geonosis -The arena

We came to rescue you, Master!

But you were captured before me!

Oh. So you came to rescue us?

Yes.

Good job.

Today, my friends, is the ultimate demonstration of the most ferocious creature in the galaxy…

An Acklay?

Erm…no.

A rancor?

A rancor?

*sighs*

Uh…no.

A larger-than-life, dripping-with-mucus, green-eyed, sharp-toothed, nerf?

How’d you guess?

That’s really what it is?

Yup. You are a smart one.

<Padmé>Told you.

<Obi-Wan>Do you hear something?

<Anakin>Yes.

<Dooku>Can we just get on with this?

<Obi-Wan>Of course.

<Dooku>*Turns away from trio* Release the nerf!

*A distant roar is heard*

<Obi-Wan>It was nice knowing you, Anakin.

<Anakin>Relax, Master. It’s only a nerf.

*Dooku exits, nerf enters, Padmé starts climbing pole*

<Anakin>A larger-than-life, dripping-with-mucus, green-eyed, sharp-toothed nerf, yes, but a nerf all the same.

<Obi-Wan>We can handle ourselves, but what about Padmé?

<Anakin>She seems to be on top of things.

<Padmé>Look at me! I’m up so high!

<Obi-Wan>Ah. Well, let’s see if we can do something about this nerf.

*The nerf runs into pillars and knocks them over. An LAAT/i lands nearby. Anakin, Padmé, and Obi-Wan leave the wreckage and walk over towards LAAT/i.*

<Mace>Thib party’b over.

<Dooku>Mace Windu, who can’t pronounce his s’s. A noble stand, but one Jedi against my new army of Super Battle Droids, larger nice embodiments of destruction, will surely fall.

<Mace>What makeb you think I’m alone?

This section of the script was omitted due to lack of resources

*All the Jedi we can get together minus Anakin, Obi Wan, and Yoda leap down beside Mace*

*As many SBDs as we have march up, followed by as many B1s as we have*

*Jedi fight it out, are slowly surrounded*

<Dooku>All is lost, Jedi. Give it up!

<Jedi 1>Look, an LAAT/i!

<Jedi 2>LAAT/i? Where?

<Jedi 1>Up, you idiot.

*LAAT/i lands, clone troopers pile out*

<Yoda>Come in, you must. Escape, we will!

<Mace>With habte, people!

*Jedi pile in, clones pile in, doors close, leaving only droids*

<The Cleaner Guy>Great, now I’ve got photocopies to clean up, too.