Star Wars Fanon:FW/Broken

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War Stories/Broken
Nominated by:  Atarumaster88  ( Talk page ) 15:04, October 25, 2013 (UTC)

Excerpt
The peaceful, violet hued atmosphere of Alderaan twinkled in the clear night sky. The occasional shooting star streaked across the star field backdrop, granting a lonely heart one wish. The full moon illuminated the landscape, casting shadows in the crevasses and peaks of the mountain range on the outskirts of Aldera, the planet’s capital. The chirps and howls of hidden, exotic fauna echoed throughout the vacant ridges. The chilled air of the high altitude had fused the layers of snow and ice together to form a slick, rigid ledge; it was an ideal landing spot amongst the jagged rocks. Any loose flakes of milky snow gently drifted across the arid tundra as the pulsing thrusters of the YT-1210 Corellian freighter, the Edessa, lowered the vessel to the surface.

The engines whined as the ship powered down, loosening the hardened terrain around the ship, burying the landing gear in centimeters of snow. The landing ramp pressed against the dusty ground, revealing two sentients. Both men were of average height and similar structure—wide at the shoulders, thick thighs, and defined arms. They appeared bred for soldiering with stronger legs over arms to be able to move faster and carry lighter weapons. It was a class of soldier as old as the mountains they had landed on, however, these two were not soldiers. At least, they were not anymore.

Objections

 * 1) The Desk
 * 2) *Much larger review to come, but I'd like to see all ship names (e.g. Edessa), italicized for starters. Atarumaster88  ( Talk page ) 15:04, October 25, 2013 (UTC)

Comments

 * Glad to see more from Tesh. Atarumaster88  ( Talk page ) 15:04, October 25, 2013 (UTC)