The Fanon Menace/Season 1/Episode 1 script

Control Ship:

 Let’s go to Naboo

 There! An MTT.


 *  *QG + OW jump inside the MTT from the front. Two Droids walk up.* 

 Don’t use that. It’s only partially done.


 *  *Zooms out to see it’s not finished. OW pops out of roof.* 

 Master, this could be a problem.

Naboo:

< Padmé> No, I will never sign your peace treaty!

 Here’s a pen.

< Padmé> Well...since you asked nicely, sure I’ll sign your treaty!


 *  *Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan jump in and slice up droids* 

< Padmé> What was that for? They really are nice mechanized embodiments of destruction once you get to know them.

 I am Qui-Gon Jinn, the benevolent Jedi Master, and this is my apprentice, Obi-Wan Kenobi, who can do an amazing Jedi Back Flip.

< Padmé> You ruined the Peace Treaty!

 We are here to save you.

< Padmé> Are you guys hearing a single thing I’m saying?

 Master Qui-Gon Jinn, the benevolent Jedi Master, we must get her back to Coruscant ASAP.

< Padmé> Apparently not.

 You are right, Padawan Obi-Wan Kenobi, who can do an amazing Jedi Back Flip. We must.


 *  *Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan look at Padmé…and close in on her.* 

< Padmé> What? Why are you guys looking at me like that? No! Stay back!


 *  *A Caution sign appears warning viewers of the morbid violence that’s about to happen. Audience hears a brief struggle, then a popping sound.* 


 *  *Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon exit room with Padmé’s head in their hands.* 

< Padmé> No! Let me go! I’m not going!

 Master? Do you think we should bring the rest of the body?

 We won’t need it.

< Padmé> What about me? Maybe I need it.


 *  *Qui-Gon turns to look at Obi-Wan.* 

 Do you hear something?

 Nope.