Talk:Knights of the Old Republic: Convict's Dawn

Ataru sez
I just finished Convict's Dawn for the second time and so have decided to post some thoughts in a little review. Having read through it twice has given me the opportunity to pick up one some of the smaller things about this work, and it was well worth the second run.

The author does an excellent job of immersing you in the story. You're right there with Zaen as he tries to determine his identity, you're right there battling Sith troopers with Gaiel. There is a lot of good interplay with scenes and settings from the Knights of the Old Republic video game&mdash;fans of that game, its sequel, or the comics spun off from it will appreciate these. There was a lot of borrowed imagery that helped with that, and it was all good. I felt the dialogue itself flowed fairly easily&mdash;some of the longer speeches were a little awkward, but nothing excessive. I got a good sense of character development through most of the novel, a tricky task given the author's unorthodox scheme of setting up the time. Indeed, the time jumps made it a bit confusing, and I came away wishing I knew more about what went on during that year&mdash;especially how Zaen became decent with a lightsaber and more on Telerus' backstory. I'm sure the author plans to address this in a sequel, but is just cashing in on the prospect of a cliffhanger ending.

I liked the storyline. It engaged me, drew me into it. I felt I could understand almost all of it, but again, that year-long-gap really leaves me wanting more. No work is perfect, though, and I did find a few rough spots, though. I found Cadasta's reaction to Mal's loss a little light, almost unbelievable given that they were fairly close. It seemed a bit surreal that she was okay-it didn't seem to me like she was just putting on a front. Another weakness I saw was that the fight scenes seem to have people absorbing a lot of damage and very little medical attention is meted out afterward. A classic example is Zaen's fight with Celsus. The scene, oddly reminiscent of [Click edit to see to avoid LotF spoilers] had people, specifically Zaen, absorbing lots of damage and shrugging it off. I also found it a little startling how Zaen got control of a ship on Taris that fast, and for only 500 credits. It seems to indicate he's just catching a ride on it, but the book also indicates that he's taking control of the ship. I felt some of the transitions were a bit confusing, like from Gaiel to Zaen on Dantooine, or from Bolook to Zaen. This didn't happen often, but it threw me off for a second when it happened.

Lastly and the most vexing, the dialogue structure was somewhat haphazard. Maybe it's just personal taste, but I like to see it as flowing into the sentence instead of being separate. An example would be:

''"I am a Jedi, like my father before me." Said Luke to the leering Emperor.''

That's how this story would probably write it. I would use something slightly different, as in

"I am a Jedi, like my father before me," said Luke to the leering Emperor.

These are all fairly small things, and IMO, the fact that a critic is demanding a sequel is a generally a good thing, especially for an author just-starting. I enjoyed all the subtle references to other Star Wars works, fanworks, and the non-Star Wars works&mdash;the author certainly didn't lie to me when he said it was lighter-hearted, which is a welcome relief from some of the EU you see on the bookshelves these days, but I digress. I had a chuckle several times throughout the reading. All in all, I'd give this work a four out of five stars. For a first work, it's quite good&mdash;a little rough around the edges, but fans of the KotOR era will be impressed by the storytelling. Atarumaster88  ( Talk page ) 06:10, 9 August 2008 (UTC)