Trial of Spirit/Part 4

Birds chirped overhead as Karalin stepped off the main pathway and into the woods. Tython’s trees towered far above him, and the deep green grass flittered with the soft zephyr. He walked for some ten minutes into the wilds, taking in the fresh air of life as he went. Eventually he came upon a cliff overlooking a massive valley, in which ran a winding, twinkling blue river. On the far side of the valley, rocky mountains scraped against the fluffy white clouds, everything coming together to make a scene Karalin could describe in only one word: beautiful.

Karalin found a cluster of rocks beside the cliff edge and sat atop it. He leaned backwards, supported by his arm, in a relaxed position and gazed out at Tython’s topography. Many a time had he come to this spot by the cliff to simply be at peace.

He admittedly found serenity in nature. But why couldn’t he find that same serenity in himself? For nearly ten years now, Master Turvo constantly urged him to find inner peace, so that he may finally claim his position as a Jedi Knight. Karalin was now twenty-seven years old and still seemingly as close to being a Knight as he was a decade ago.

Not close at all.

He likely would’ve been knighted several years back had he not acted the way he did. The Jedi Council felt that Karalin’s dark demeanor would ultimately plunge him into shadow; on the other hand he was certain that would never happen, as his will was “like durasteel,” as he had put it. They told him that in order to become a Jedi Knight, he needed to seek out a purpose beyond vengeance.

It’s all bantha crap, Karalin thought as he closed his eyes, taking in the breeze.

Long ago he had completed a majority of his Knight trials. The five trials—Skill, Courage, Flesh, Insight, and Spirit—were the final stepping stones in a Padawan’s training towards becoming a full-fledged Jedi Knight. In some cases they were not all completed by Padawans-turned-Knights, unlike Karalin who had thus far completed four of them. Skill and Courage when he faced the Sith ten years ago, Flesh when he took Nerox’s lightsaber to the face, and Insight some years ago when he underwent the “sand test.” Since then, the Council was yet to issue the Trial of Spirit. He doubted they would—it was not commonly dictated by any Jedi.

Find peace, they say, Karalin thought as he opened his eyes. Serenity within himself was an impossible achievement. He knew there would be only one way to find satisfaction: Nerox’s demise, preferably by his own hand.

He sighed.

“Why so gloomy?” a voice came from behind him.

Karalin turned around to see a green-skinned Twi’lek approaching. His eyes were a bright purple and his expressions were quite friendly. He wore a beige-colored tunic, his sleeves rolled up to showcase his somewhat muscular build. Silka beads hung behind his head, making it clear that he too was a Padawan learner. A warm feeling of brotherhood overcame Karalin as he smiled. Of all the people that fell on Coruscant, he was glad Daerit’hal Morana was not one of them.

“Gloomy? Me?” He put on a puzzled face.

Daerith raised a brow, but that expression quickly disappeared as the two laughed. “All the time,” he smiled.

The Twi’lek sat himself down at the cliff edge, dangling a leg off the side. He took a deep breath, taking in the fresh air. “But in all seriousness, you seem flustered.”

Karalin sighed agitatedly, “Master Turvo doesn’t understand.”

“Understand what?” Daerith turned to face Karalin behind him, cocking a head to the side as he did.

“The pain I’ve had to endure.”

Silence. It was less so due to Daerith being unsure how to respond, and more so because he felt the same way. He too had endured so much trauma over the last decade, ever since Master Kalona met the same fate as Alric. He too held bitterness inside him as he wished he could travel back in time and rewrite history. That was a prospect he had to accept would never be possible, although he did not want to have to admit that.

“Easier for you to endure, considering you’re a Zabrak…” Daerith spoke softly.

The joke did cause Karalin to grin rather wryly, “We may have a high pain tolerance, but I think that only applies to physical pain…” He trailed off, lost in his own thoughts.

“Karalin, I know what you’re going to try to say. You ought to relax, I don’t think there’s been a single moment since Coruscant when you’re not thinking of Nerox,” Daerith said.

“How can you not?” Karalin retorted.

The Twi’lek sighed and admitted, “I do.”

“Ah, stop being such a hypocrite.” Again Karalin paused, staring off into space for a long moment. “I can’t rest. Not until he’s dead.”

“Yep. There it is,” Daerith muttered as he nodded his head slowly. “Look, I want to see Nerox pay for his crimes as much as you do. Really, I do. But…don’t act rash, please.”

Karalin snorted, “I’m not a fool, Daerith. I understand Nerox’s strength—I’ll never forget the casualty numbers under his name…”

Silence ensued once again. Some time after Coruscant, Karalin and Daerith discovered the casualty reports from the Jedi Temple. That was how they found the name Nerox. But the casualties under his name were not limited to Alric and Kalona; the Sith had killed dozens of Jedi Masters single-handedly through all the conflict. Quite a feat for likely even the members of the Dark Council, it had earned Lord Nerox the nickname “Butcher of Coruscant.”

Daerith nodded again, “I know. Sorry.”

But Karalin did not respond. He continued to gaze out onto the horizon for a long moment. Such serenity. As he looked on, images of this place ablaze flashed in his mind. He could see blaster fire from warships destroying Tython’s surface, scorching the earth for the rest of eternity. He shivered as he heard maniacal cackling from off in the distance, and voices shouting his name with desperation as they grew quieter and more distant.

He blinked. There was no fire, no destruction. Daerith sat below him at the cliff edge, looking at him with knit brows. In a rather uncharacteristically calm tone, Karalin said, “We’ll put an end to this torment. One day.”

“I believe it,” Daerith replied.