Talk:Star Wars: The Eternal Slumber/Chapter 1

Review
Well, I read about 3/4 of the article. (My first review, so don't bash me.)

Oh, and by the way, cheers to Lord Hoth! -- Obi Maul12 (Meet a Warrior) (talk to me) 11:39, 15 April 2008 (UTC)
 * First, it was a great idea to join together all of the major heroes and villains in star wars. Great idea. However, the storyline seems to be a little weak. What I mean is that you don't really explain how all of these characters end up in the same place; even though they are ghosts ( am I correct?), there would still be a larger area in the netherworld to where it would be difficult to appear in almost the exact same spot as other important Jedi and Sith. What I'm saying is you needed to elaborate more in the beginning. I was intrigued by the dialogue, but is Kol dead or alive at the point where he is carrying his apprentice? Is he hit by the lightning, or his apprentice? Other than the first 1/5 or so, though, it's a fairly nice story. 7/10 so far. Keep up the work.