The Fanon Menace/Season 2/Episode 32 script

Endor -Luke tells Leia she’s his sister and leaves

 Leia, can I talk to you for a minute?

 Sure. What’s wrong?

 Well...

 *interrupting* You’re madly in love with a woman, and need sisterly advice on how to tell her?

 No, actually, it’s...

 You’re going to leave the Jedi Order? How could you? Is it because you left a girl on Tatooine?

 Would you just let me finish? I’m...

 You’re joining the Empire, aren’t you. It’s because of their E-11 blaster rifles...or better yet, it’s because of a certain female officer you met on the Death Star.

 Leia!

 What?

 Just...listen. I’m...

 Going to...sorry, I’m just trying to make up for 18 years of not being your sister.

 That’s just it. I have to tell you that I’m your brother.

 Yeah, we established that back on the first Death Star.

 Yes, we did, but I just felt like you needed to hear it here.

 Wait, if you’re my brother...that means...Darth Vader is your father.

<Luke> My father? That’s not true! That’s impossible!

<Leia> Well, if you’re related to me, and I’m related to him...yeah, you’re definitely related to him.

<Luke> No...maybe...Mom got remarried and I’m not related to him.

<Leia> We’re twins.

<Luke> I...I’m disowning him! I’m disowning the Skywalker name! I’m now becoming...a Groundcrawler!

<Leia> Isn’t that kind of a demotion from Skywalker?

<Luke> Fine, then, I’ll be Luke Spaceflier.

<Leia> Ok. Wait, if you’re disowning the Skywalkers, then you’re disowning me, too!

<Luke> I can’t do that. You’re my sister!

<Leia> And Darth Vader’s your father.

<Luke> I know, you can become a Spaceflier, too! Leia Organa Spaceflier...it’s got a nice ring to it.

<Leia> But what about Mom?

<Luke> Mom?

<Leia> Yes, Mom. You know, Mother? The one who gave birth to us? She retired from the Senate and has a summer home on Naboo that she lives in all year round. Every so often, she would come to Alderaan to see me.

<Luke> Fine...I’ll stay a Skywalker. But I’m leaving.

<Leia> Why? We need you here!

<Luke> That’s the other thing that I needed to tell you...I have to fight Darth Vader...I mean, Dad. Whoa, so that vision on Dagobah was right? That’s weird.

<Leia> Why?

<Luke> Because I need to.

<Leia> Why?

<Luke> Because that’s what I have to do.

<Leia> Why?

<Luke> Because I was told to.

<Leia> Why?

<Luke> Because...I’m leaving. Goodbye.

<Leia> Why?

*Luke leaves*

<Leia> But...I really don’t know why.