The Fanon Menace/Season 2/Episode 15 script

Hoth -Luke in snowy desert/Luke rescued by Han


 * *Luke emerges from cave*

 Man, it’s cold out here. *starts walking*

 Luuuuke…Luuuuuuuuke…

 Nice try, Obi. You couldn’t scare me if your life depended on it.

 Aw, man. It was worth a try.

 Is that a wool jacket you’ve got on? Can I have it?

 No! It’s mine! You wouldn’t like it, anyway. The wind just cuts straight through it.

 The wind just cuts straight through you, too…what did you say you came here for?

 I came here to tell you… *silence*

 To tell me what?

 I forgot.

 *sarcastically* Great. Even becoming one with the Force didn’t raise your IQ.

 Nope. Now, what was that…let’s see…you had to go somewhere…but where? Hmmm…Alderaan? No, it wasn’t Alderaan. Maybe Corellia? No, that’s 25. Uh…I’ve got it! Xagobah!

 Xagobah? Why? What’s on Xagobah?

 You have to go there to meet the great Jedi Master Yoda!


 * *Han rides up in snowspeeder*

 Luke! You’re alright!

 No thanks to you…

<Han> You’re lucky wampas hibernate in winter.

<Luke> Hibernate in winter? There’s summer on Hoth?

<Han> No…I guess that explains why they don’t get out much. By the way, your Rebel friends have arrived. They lent me this speeder so I could go look for you. They told me that I could take as much time as I needed, and I didn’t have to hurry back.

<Luke> I was just wondering whether I was going to have to walk all the way back to base or not.

<Han> Get in! Who’s your friend?

<Luke> That’s Obi, remember? He turned into a Force ghost.

<Han> He looks kinda blue. Is he cold? Tell him to go inside.

<Luke> Can we just go?

<Han> Sure.


 * *Luke and Han fly off*

<Force Ghost Obi> I have a sneaking suspicion that I made a mistake…

-Domain fleet above Hoth

<Mon Mothma> Luke! Thank goodness you’re back! We’re in deep trouble!

<Luke> What is it?

<Mon Mothma> A Domain fleet, right above us!

<Han> That’s no problem. Just activate the shield.

<Mon Mothma> What shield?

<Han> You didn’t see the big red button in the center control panel that says, “Press to activate base deflector shield in case of Domain invasion”?

<Mon Mothma> No…

<Han> Do I have to do everything myself? *walks over to console and pushes big red button* There. Now they can’t do anything against us from orbit!

<C-3PO> Sir! I have just found six AT-AT transports and twelve AT-ST scout walkers, flanked by twenty-four IFT-T tanks approaching on the scanners.

<Luke> *to Han* You had to open your big mouth.

<Mon Mothma> To the snowspeeders!

<Dodonna> To the briefing room!


 * *Exit to briefing room*

<Mon Mothma> You’re doing that on purpose, aren’t you?!